Grandma's Fridge

GRANDMA’S FRIDGE

Inside the fridge, she saw a lot of things that didn’t seem normal. Didn’t seem like things that a Grandmother would have to eat and drink but that was because it was my Grandma’s fridge. It always smelled like something was off, but I overlooked that problem because it always produced things in which I was interested. My Grandma died when I was thirteen so I remember her well. Grandpa died eight years before so my memories are more vague, but I remember he always sais things like “Be careful of that fridge, something strange lives in there and it eats little kids!”. I didn’t really believe him, but I still never went to the fridge myself. I would push my sister in front of me and tell her to get an individual tetra pak of juice for me. That was one of the things I really liked, especially on a hot day; Mum never let us have those individual juices with the bendy straws. The carton was always icy cold and we had a choice of flavours. There were yummy, smooth, choc wedge ice-creams in the freezer too. When it was time to go home the fridge always produced a small packet of mixed lollies for each of us, packets of fund raiser lamingtons and an extra drink to go. Mum used to hate it – we always had to stop for a toilet on the way home. I miss Grandma and her fridge.

Grandma's Fridge

GRANDMA’S FRIDGE

Inside the fridge, she saw a lot of things that didn’t seem normal. Didn’t seem like things that a Grandmother would have to eat and drink but that was because it was my Grandma’s fridge. It always smelled like something was off, but I overlooked that problem because it always produced things in which I was interested. My Grandma died when I was thirteen so I remember her well. Grandpa died eight years before so my memories are more vague, but I remember he always sais things like “Be careful of that fridge, something strange lives in there and it eats little kids!”. I didn’t really believe him, but I still never went to the fridge myself. I would push my sister in front of me and tell her to get an individual tetra pak of juice for me. That was one of the things I really liked, especially on a hot day; Mum never let us have those individual juices with the bendy straws. The carton was always icy cold and we had a choice of flavours. There were yummy, smooth, choc wedge ice-creams in the freezer too. When it was time to go home the fridge always produced a small packet of mixed lollies for each of us, packets of fund raiser lamingtons and an extra drink to go. Mum used to hate it – we always had to stop for a toilet on the way home. I miss Grandma and her fridge.

English student For Sale

RED HOT SALE

One outstanding English student available for purchase to the highest bidder.

You’ll never know what you missed if you pass up the chance to have me in your class.

My attributes include:

• A wicked sense of humour.
• A unique way of thinking.
• A maturity that is rare.

My spelling, punctuation, writing and expression will keep you on your toes; you’ll never fall asleep correcting my work.

Who am I?

I’m the middle child in a family of two siblings, two parents, two dogs, two cars (one’s a paddock bomb), two guinea pigs and unfortunately four cats and eight ducks.

I sleep, work, study, eat and live in what should be the lounge room of a prehistoric, rented, soldier settlement house on 130 acres. The one bright spot is that it overlooks the local reservoir which actually has water in it.

My body matches my ego and my dreams. I would be a benevolent dictator, but I don’t think politics is my calling. I see myself as a physician.

When I have money I will be a champion archer, an innovative games programmer and a charismatic radio presenter.

I’m at my new school because my previous course coordinator mistook my humour for a dangerous, potentially violent psychosis. She thought I was going to do a ‘Columbine’ on the class.